More of Jan Richardson’s words today: more than enough.
Perhaps the truth is that we are on a journey both to recognize God in all her guises and also to learn how to show our true faces to God and one another.
I can barely ask you
to unmask me
for fear your touch
on my face
would shatter skin.And yet,
shed of every guise,
I long to be
in your gaze
beheld,
in your sight
beloved;
in your presence
bereft
of all that keeps me
unrevealed.
For your reflection:
- Can you name God’s guises; the different faces she wears?
- Can you name your own?
- What would it be like if you showed your true face to God and to others?
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
According to my religious tradition, “HE” is everywhere in everything, and yet “HE” is locked in the pages of a big book. In reality, I am finding “SHE” is in fact everywhere and in everything speaking, showing, guiding, leading. She is in the words of a trusted friend. She is in the book that finds me and contains nothing less than divinely inspired writings (which uh…supposedly stopped 2000+ years ago?). She is in the daily inspirational email that lands in my inbox perfectly timed to address my question de jeur. She is in the gently falling snowflakes that are abundantly nourishing our little piece of desert this year. She is in the quiet serenity of all too infrequent alone time. She is even in the snippy retort of a co-worker, which reminds me that my journey lies elsewhere and it is time to move on. The list goes on….
My primary guise is that of a with-it, level-headed, intelligent, scientific, practical stoic with occasional controlled bouts of emotion. Not always maintained under stress, but it is the desired image that is expected by self and preferred by others. Presenting anything else makes for an uncomfortable production for all.
I think God sees my true face. The process is one of God revealing my true face to me and getting me to embrace and accept it. Showing my true face “all of the sudden” to others (and even to me) might actually result in a complete change of relationships…at least that is my fear. My true face as it is being revealed to me doesn’t really fit within the small Bible belt environment that is my home town. And yet, by gradually revealing what is being revealed to me, little by little, others are opening up and questioning long held beliefs.
I love this, Angie. I love that you are experiencing God in all her guises in all the ways/places/texts in which we’ve assumed “he” dwells. And of course, She sees your true face. Keep letting all those around you see that face, as well. It is lovely. No masks.
I’m thinking about the difference between our faces being revealed, and when we are authentic. I think those two things are potentially different. I hope to be authentic. I enjoy other people most, when they are authentic. Authenticity, it seems to me, is when the face we think we are revealing, and the face we really are revealing, are largely the same. When our selfness comes through that channel clearly and consistently.
When I am around people who come through the channel of their revealings with clarity and consistency and realness, I am more authentic, I come through more clearly and more consistently. I am not as tempted to hide. I am not as tempted to lie to myself or judge myself and others. When I am around people who reveal faces which are themselves shadowed, faces they do not know in their self-conscious mirror, the same gap can open up within me, between my authenticity and my own unowned shadowed faces.
Something about their accidental undesired unmasking feels like it does threaten to shatter my skin. Somehow it frightens me. Seeing secrets I’m not supposed to see, out of the shadows. It’s the very existence of that gap that frightens me. That gap that we try to hide from ourselves, the way we hide the gap and the knowledge of the gap both, from ourselves. I guess I go there, too, to hide. To try to not be revealed.
But we cannot help but be revealed.
What I would like from myself, when I catch glimpses of revealings from shadow, either in others or myself, is to see that not as a revealing but as a revelation. To see how we are all broken, all small and fragile… and simultaneously all glorious, all holy, all sacred. I often don’t manage to see it that way. But it seems to me that to do that, to see in that way, is in fact, to be shed of every guise, beheld, beloved. That is literally the God’s-eye view. Maybe paradoxically to be held in revealedness. Revelation. Rather than it being frightening to be seen.
I’d like that. To feel that and know it. Held and beheld with delight, cherished and celebrated, in my revelation.
Thank you, Ronna.
So much here, Karen, and so interesting to think about the difference between revealing and authenticity – about the risks and the gifts in both. And perhaps the greatest gift? Your closing words: “…to be seen. I’d like that. To feel that and know it. Held and ehld with delight, cherished and celebrated, in my revelation.” Perfect. Brilliant. Seen. Thank you.