Have you ever done a cost/benefit analysis on what you believe? It’s not the traditional language we apply to things that often feel lofty and are not easily examined on an Excel spreadsheet. But here’s what’s true: there are most definitely costs and benefits in every belief we hold. And one usually outweighs the other – whether we’re aware of such or not.
Examples:
Belief: The earth is flat.
Cost: A pretty cataclysmic event will occur when you come to it’s edge. Be careful.
Benefit: You exist at the center of the universe (I know, kind of narcissistic). But further, this can then perpetuate religious/theological beliefs which allow for particular powers to be wielded, destinies to be ordained, worlds to be conquered. (At least that was part of the argument hundreds of years ago when Galileo was tortured for his heretical belief that the sun, not the earth, was the center of the universe).
Belief: Hell is a real place.
Cost: If you do not live your life in a certain way (as prescribed by particular denominations/faiths/creeds) then upon death you will know eternal damnation, fire, etc. Not pretty.
Benefit: Just the opposite, right? If you live your life the “right” way then you’ll go to heaven.
Belief: Heaven is not a real place.
Cost: You live an amazingly good life, die, and not reap eternal reward.
Benefit: You will live an amazingly good life, die, and have lived an amazingly good life.
OK. Let me quickly say that my intent is not to debate the theological impact of the earth’s shape, heaven, or hell (though I could, on at least two of the three – and I’m not giving away my stance on either, at least in this post). My intent is (merely) to show that what we believe actually has ramifications.
Let me bring it a bit closer to home.
Belief: I can’t really expect to have the things I desire.
Cost: Very little. If I don’t expect much, I won’t be disappointed. I won’t be passionate. I won’t dream. I won’t hope. (Aaaaugh! Shoot me now!)
Benefit: I don’t have to risk. I don’t have to try. I don’t have to maintain a tenacious clinging to my passions, goals, and dreams which then creates the impetus and focus for every single day of my life. In other words, I’ll live a pretty neutral, safe, predictable life that won’t demand much of me. (Except your very soul!!!)
Belief: I am “too much” in relationship.
Cost: If I tell the truth, really act on what I feel, and just live in an authentic way I will scare off most everyone that matters to me.
Benefit:I can safely protect myself from being disappointed by keeping myself quieter, smaller, less-noticed, less-me…just less, frankly. (OK…the costs here just keep mounting. Don’t get me started!)
I could go on and on.
There’s a poem by Sophia Fahs called It Matters What You Believe and in it this stanza:
Some beliefs are like blinders, shutting off the power to one’s own direction.
Other beliefs are like gateways opening wide vistas for exploration.
I love this. And it serves as another accounting-like tool for examining what I believe, how I make decisions, what guides me on a daily basis. It’s a cost/benefit analysis. Blinders or Gateways. Shutting off the power to my own direction or opening wide the vistas for exploration. Costs? Indeed. Benefits? Definitely. So choose!
As you might imagine, I have opinions about this. Strong ones.
I can believe anything provided it is incredible.
(Oscar Wilde)
We are what we believe we are.
(C.S. Lewis)
Yep. Beliefs matter. A lot. Do the math. Or hire a good accountant.
Want to have more provocative conversation on this topic?
- When you run your predominant beliefs through a cost/benefit analysis, what happens?
- Can you feel the risks inherent? Can you let yourself think as objectively as possible for the sake of the exercise?
- What happens when your beliefs clash with others’? What are the costs/benefits in those scenarios?
- Will you name the fears that get exposed? Another layer of beliefs abide underneath those fears. More cost/benefit analysis to be done…
Even asking the questions makes me wish I could talk to you…to hear what’s unearthed, what emerges, what causes you to cringe, what causes you to celebrate. Such great conversations yet to be had!!!
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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
I love the CS Lewis quote, and totally agree with it – but in truth I find it inspiring and terrifying in equal measure.
Wow! Yeah….felt like that last paragraph had my name written all over it.
‘Love that such is true, Angie. Thanks for saying so!!
You wrote: “Even asking the questions makes me wish I could talk to you…to hear what’s unearthed, what emerges, what causes you to cringe, what causes you to celebrate. Such great conversations yet to be had!!!” You know my phone number. Call and I’ll tell you what I think about each of your three examples — heaven, hell, and flat earth. Hint: I’m not a flat-earther, in case you couldn’t guess!
.-= Bonnie Jacobs´s last blog .."This One’s for the Girls" =-.
You make me smile, Bonnie. And I can guess you stance on heaven and hell…Let’s schedule another phone conversation in the weeks ahead!
Ronna – I come back day after day for your words. They inspire and they push all in one movement. Thank you! I feel more words coming to me but, alas, I also feel the need for some herbal tea. Physical need is winning out.
.-= Nicki´s last blog ..Bed Rest Anyone? =-.
Thanks, Nicki. I appreciate you coming back. I appreciate your words. And I appreciate your need for good tea. Rest. I’m quite certain you deserve it!
love it. and as Eckhart Tolle has said: Every belief is an obstacle.
I had not heard this quote before, Danielle, and WOW does it give me pause! AND…I love it! Thank you!
I read a book by Caroline Casey a few years back that contained this gem: “Believe nothing. Entertain possibilities.” I’m a big fan of that approach and am working hard to dismantle beliefs that don’t serve me. I feel like “belief” as we generally use it these days tends to stand in our way rather than empowering us, because it implies adhering to a single perspective — and for me, keeping the options open (entertaining possibilities) is by far the more enlightening, albeit challenging, place to work from…
.-= Lauren´s last blog ..Crafty Superstar =-.
Preach it, Lauren! We’re definitely trackin’! Thank you.
Seeing beyond the belief system that we carry with us is often a difficult challenge. Just when we feel we have grown past the benefit, something jumps up and bites us in the behind that makes the cost look tolerable, if not appealing. The choice can be overwhelming. Balance, Coral…balance.
.-= Coral´s last blog ..A Salute to My Nephews =-.
OK. Let me quickly say that my intent is not to debate the theological impact of the earth’s shape, heaven, or hell (though I could, on at least two of the three – and I’m not giving away my stance on either, at least in this post). My intent is (merely) to show that what we believe actually has ramifications.
Brilliant!! ~Renee Michelle Morrison
Thank you, Michelle!
Ronna, I have just found your site and am so glad I did
I recently began blogging about some of my spiritual experiences in life, and it is so wonderful to know that there are others out there who have felt the very same ostracization from the church and even family and friends when long-held (and cherished) faiths have, shall we say, morphed. I have yet to explore your blog fully, and I’m hoping I will run across your personal story of faith finding as I do. I look forward to further conversation!
P.S. If you don’t like the occasional cuss word, you might keep a distance from my blog
So glad you’ve found me – and vice versa. And no worries: no offense taken at language choices. We’re all good! Yes…more conversations to follow!
Ronna, I wonder if you wouldn’t mind directing me to a post specifically about your own journey from “faith to faith” as it were – apologies if I’ve missed the obvious
Love that you asked.
Ambivalence as home…at least for now.
A lock on God?
Sometimes Homesick
This thing called “faith.”
In the Wasteland
There are so many more – in bits and pieces, fragments of thought, the wanderings and wonderings in my brain and heart. A taste, for sure. Again, thanks for asking Terrisa.